By Tony Flood
Henry Goldsmith felt very pleased with himself. He had spent the early part of a cold November evening in the arms of his mistress in her ground-floor flat. Now, two hours later, he prepared to address a meeting on his specialist subject, conseration and global warming.
About 40 people had gathered in an Eastbourne church hall for the meeting and they applauded loudly when he was introduced.
Henry began: “Global warming is doing so much damage by increasing the Earth’s average surface temperature due to an over-emittance of greenhouse gases that collect in the atmosphere. This traps the sun’s heat and causes the planet to warm.”
As Henry, a 35-year-old scientific researcher, continued, he became aware of the door opening at the back of the hall and a late-comer entering.
He looked up, surprised to see it was his wife Amanda.
Trying to regain his concentration, Henry went on: “We can all help by saving energy. One simple way to do this is to turn off the lights when we leave a room or put them on dim if we don’t need the room to be fully lit.”
Henry felt alarm as he saw that Amanda, instead of quietly taking a seat, had marched boldly forward to stand in front of him.
Worse still, his normally shy wife shouted angrily: “You make me sick Henry Goldsmith. Our marriage is over.”
“What’s this about, darling?” he asked, bewildered. “Why are you embarrassing me like this?”
Amanda’s flinty grey eyes glared at him. “Because of your womanizing. The private detective I hired to follow you has just brought me photographic proof that you were misbehaving with your mistress in her apartment earlier this evening. Not only are you an adulterer, you’re a fool and a hypocrite. You and your woman friend were so eager that you got undressed with the lights on and the curtains open! Obviously you were not concerned at the time with saving energy and global warming!”
Everyone present would long remember Henry’s mistake – and the value of turning off lights when not required.
This is one of the intriguing stories from the book jointly written by Heather and Tony Flood titled Laughs and Tears Galore! Stories and Poems with Twists Available to buy from Amazon.
Author Bio:
Author Tony Flood, who lives in Eastbourne, has spent most of his working life as a journalist, initially on local and regional papers and then on nationals. He was also editor of ‘Football Monthly’, Controller of Information at Sky Television and enjoyed a spell with ‘The People.’ In his celebrity book ‘My Life With The Stars – Sizzling Secrets Spilled’, Tony recalls: “My work as a showbiz and leisure writer, critic and editor saw me take on a variety of challenges – learning to dance with Strictly Come Dancing star Erin Boag, becoming a stand-up comedian and playing football with the late George Best and Bobby Moore in charity matches.” My Life With The Stars provides revelations and amusing anecdotes about showbiz and sports personalities including Elvis Presley, Marilyn Monroe, Frank Sinatra, Muhammad Ali, George Best, Kylie Minogue, Eric Morecambe and Des O’Connor. Tony also writes in other genres and his crime thrillers have been endorsed by best-selling author Peter James. They are Triple Tease, Stitch Up – Killer or Victim? and Fall Guy – who really killed his wife?, and all feature compassionate copper DCI Harvey Livermore. In addition, there’s a fantasy adventure for youngsters called Secret Potion and a book Tony has co-written with wife Heather, aptly titled ‘Laughs and Tears Galore – short stories and poems with twists!‘ Recently, Tony joined The Collective of seven local writers all contributing one character to family saga Driven by Desire, which is full of conflict, fierce ambition and passion as well as a dramatic kidnap. Tony also writes theatre reviews for the Eastbourne Herald, Brighton Argus and BourneFree Live, as well as playing veterans football for Sovereign Harbour Veterans. He is the oldest – and slowest – player in the team.
Contact Author:
Contact Author:
tflood04@yahoo.co.uk
